Rest

In the beginning, God created the heavens and the Earth...

and then he sat back and said, "This is good."

Then he did something really remarkable by modern standards...he rested.

How many modern people, especially those grouchy, judgmental ones, gather that the very first model of godliness in the bible is appreciation and rest?

I need this lesson desperately right now. I feel so tired and overwhelmed by work, a mortgage, even sometimes disappointment and fear, and I never really give myself a break. Not a real break. A break from not only working but also from speaking, thinking, acting. A true rest from every thing.

Sunday, I was so blech. That's the only word for it. I had a headache and a stomachache just thinking about work. I felt like bursting into tears when I looked at the state of my house, which could pass for a FEMA trailer right after a tornado. Fain, always the guardian angel, wanted to go to our neighbor's house, but I knew I needed to clean. However, I was too tired to even argue, so away we went.

I flopped down on their hammock and just lay there in the cool breeze of late morning. I couldn't help feeling gratitude for the smell of fall, fallen pine needles and damp maple leaves, the shade provided by the overgrown wax myrtle and the late blooming zinnias and dahlias. For a few moments, I allowed myself to push those thoughts of lesson plans and essays and unswept floors off of a cliff in the back of my mind.

But they keep crawling back over, which I suppose is a sign that I need to sweep, but is it a sign of something else also? Am I so caught up in the swaggering power of busyness that I can't even relax anymore?

Fain assigned an adjective to each of his immediate family members. My mom was happy. I was tired. My dad was also tired, but not as tired as me, according to Fain. That's just sad. I don't want to be the tired one.